I feel like a middle schooler getting her first text from her crush every single time you text me
I can’t do anything right.
No matter how hard I try, no matter how much I put myself out there-
It’s never good enough.
I’m always doing something wrong.
But yet, you sit there and couldn’t give two shits.
Your hypocritical criticism is starting to send me over the edge.
I want to pull my hair out and place it in you hands.
I want you to see what you’re doing to me.
You say you know you could be better to me, then go straight into blaming everything on me.
You won’t talk to me, so how can I fix it.
You don’t have realistic standards, so of course I’m going to do something wrong.
You act like its absurd when I ask you if you really love me.
Yet, you sit there and make empty promises to me.
Lying to me and watching as I cry helplessly gripping onto the threads of our relationship that you dangle in front of me, as if I were a cat.
How am I the bad guy again?
Why am I the only one trying here?
I can only do so much before I’m changing the person I am for you. And no one in my life will ever be worth that.
Maybe instead of always being so critical of me you should look at yourself.
Turn the mirror inward and see how you are affecting the relationship.
I can’t do this on my own anymore.
People pleasing is the plague of our generation.
It’s the thought that our ideas aren’t good enough anymore.
We lose our sense of personality, creativity, and individualism.
We think our opinions need to be approved and excepted by everyone else.
News flash, they don’t.
Some of the greatest and most extraordinary people went against culture and popular opinion.
I don’t want to be another Suzy from math class.
I want to be an Einstein.
So quit condoning this behavior.
Stop lumping yourself in with everyone else.
Tell me your real thoughts. I want to hear them.
I want to go through the journey as you put your very own unique, virgin, innocent thought out into the world.
I want to be there for your Eureka! moment.
At the end of the day we are only a collection of our personality, experiences, and thoughts.
Quit repressing who you are and let the beautiful creature God created inside of you to surface.
The world could survive without another Suzy from math class; so be someone worth taking up space on this boring planet.